Quotes By Steven Wright...

If you love Steven Wright (sometimes mistakenly spelled Stephen Wright), you can join the thousands of people who laugh themselves silly over his ironic, witty, and clever quotations every single day.

I know I sure do -- that's why it was so difficult to confine myself to just ten favorites.

Still, number one came easily enough, because Steven Wright actually gave me the inspiration for my sister's birthday card: "Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth. On the back it said, 'Wish you were here'."

If you're not familiar with comedian Steven Wright, this is a great place to get started. You might even find the perfect description of your very own life: "Well, you know when you're rocking in a rocking chair, and you go so far that you almost fall over backwards, but at the last instant you catch yourself? That's how I feel all the time."

It's true: few can match Steven Wright for humor and wit. Enjoy this site and become a little more familiar with Steven Wright humor.

You can find a list of our favorites in the...

Top 10 List of Steven Wright Quotes:

Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #1
Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth. On the back it said, "Wish you were here."
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #2
I made wine out of raisins so I wouldn't have to wait for it to age.
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #3
I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #4
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #5
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #6
My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere.
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #7
(Referring to a glass of water) I mixed this myself. Two parts H, one part O. I don't trust anybody.
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #8
My theory on evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #9
There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.
Favorite Quotes By Steven Wright #10
I went to a general store. They wouldn't let me buy anything specifically.

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